Paradigm U. Podcast
Paradigm U. Podcast
146: Embrace the Wonder: Lisa's Guide to an Awesome Life
Have you ever marveled at the unbridled curiosity and fearlessness of children as they embark on new adventures and constantly learn from their mistakes? I know I have, and it’s an inspiration that we can all tap into at any stage of our life.
This episode is a voyage into the realm of possibilities that opens up when we reignite the childlike spirit of wonder within us to dream and reinvent ourselves. Together with Lisa, a Coach and mother of two, we explore the joy in appreciating the simple things, and how it all contributes to creating an awesome life.
Do you remember the last time you allowed yourself to dream big? Lisa does, and she takes us through her personal journey of embracing simplicity and dreaming again.
It may seem challenging to reconcile the pursuit of a simple life with the ambition for abundance, but Lisa's insights can help us navigate this paradox. By understanding and aligning with our values, we can move past feeling stuck to create the life we truly desire.
So let's dream again, take inspired action, and manifest the life we've always wanted.
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Welcome to the Paradise.
Speaker 2:New Podcast. Hello, this is Lisa Cernowski, and I have the great pleasure to co-host this week's podcast episode, where we are talking about how to create anything you want in life yes, really anything. So please listen to the end, where you will find out exactly what you need to do to create an awesome life and have a whole lot of fun doing it.
Speaker 3:You're listening to the Paradise New Podcast. You're about to start transforming your life by growing your mind and expanding your paradise. Here we'll cover real life topics, just like the stuff you'd share with a good friend. This podcast will serve up topics that weigh on our hearts and keep us up at night, Whether it's navigating parenthood and becoming an adult, or wayfinding, personal development, marriage and money. You, my friend, are in the right place. If you're wanting a lot more in life to feel better, to heal, to have peace of mind, to feel powerful in the life and to bring more abundance and prosperity in your life, then this podcast is for you. Here we'll offer the opportunity to shift your paradigms by growing your mind, and when you do that, anything you want becomes possible for you. I'm glad you're here.
Speaker 4:All right well, welcome to the podcast. As mentioned on our social media platform and we've been communicating with all of the people who follow along with us on our weekly newsletter. We've given them the insider track and now we're rolling it out I would like to introduce you to my new co-host, Lisa Sarnowski. Hello, co-host, it's so official. Yeah, welcome. You're kind of a big deal, all right. Well, for all of the listeners who've heard you on the podcast before, thank you so much for listening. But for all of the new listeners who maybe haven't gotten to know you, lisa, or heard about you, can you do a quick intro? Just maybe tell a little bit about yourself, because I love you, but I'd love for all of our listeners to fall in love with you as well.
Speaker 2:No pressure, I know. Okay, let's see a little bit about me. I have been coaching for 14 years. I started in the holistic health and wellness space and then I moved to the online coaching business coaching space and then, most recently, I've been business coaching a lot of people across industries. I am married and I have two kids. We live over in Milwaukee, in Bayview, and most recently we are officially Globetrotters. We have actually done some international travel with the kids now, which has been super fun.
Speaker 4:Very cool. I love it. So we're both moms, we're both starting to wrap up summer and a lot of our listeners have kids as well. Any advice, being the brilliant woman that you are, for those who have children, who are headed back to school pretty soon.
Speaker 2:Oh, breathe, we are right there with you. The timeline is real. I know we've seen the memes and the social media posts go out that you only have 18 summers with your kids and you have this timeline. I like to think that we get to have whatever time we want with our kids, and that doesn't have to look traditional. So school is coming. That's wonderful. I also think that we can choose to embrace school how we want, but I think education might be a topic for a different day. So parents, moms, we got you Breathe into it. A good menu plan can go a long way.
Speaker 4:Ooh, that might be a topic for another podcast as well. Yes, Lisa definitely is the person who taught me how to make dinners, so you have to learn from you, like I did.
Speaker 4:All right, well, as we are going into this new season of the Paradigm you podcast, we are going to be covering a lot of different topics and two of them that we potentially just added just in the last few minutes of this conversation over the course of the next few weeks and months, but today I would really like to talk about our kids going back to school and what that looks like for all of the parents and, quite frankly, all of us who have that inner child still nested within. Lisa, can you talk to me a little bit about what your thoughts are when I say kids are going back and we have that inner child that's in us. That is probably coming out or bubbling up in some way?
Speaker 2:Yeah, Do you remember back to school? I remember there's this line in You've Got Mail and Meg Ryan talks about the smell of a bouquet of freshly sharpened pencils. And I think of that because when I go into a store and I'm buying their school supplies, I love it. It's just such an exciting time because and you can see the little wonder in their eyes Not all of them might be excited for one reason or another, but there's a wonder, there's a curiosity there, and recently I was thinking and I know we were talking about it April about where does that sense of wonder and dreaming go?
Speaker 2:As an adult, Like we've had, we've dreamt our whole life. We were encouraged to dream. How many times as a kid yourself, were you asked what are you going to be when you grow up? The answer to that for me is I still don't know. But yeah, I love to look at their little sense of wonder and curiosity and I really like to bring that into coaching because as adults, I feel like that has faded for us, whether that's because of our environment, whether it's because we're adults.
Speaker 2:Our head is down. We have so much more responsibility. You know, I think my parents made it look so easy. When I look back at all they were doing and really there's a lot there, especially in our world today. There's a lot flying at us as parents. So adults, I think we can all learn from our kids this time of year. They're jumping into a new classroom or with a new teacher. They're going to be hanging out with new students and learning a lot of new things, and continuing to fail while doing it. And when was the last time we did that, you know?
Speaker 4:so that's what's been on my heart lately, and Lisa, can you tell me, oh gosh, sorry, alarms that say drink water. Actually that was a bus alarm. Oh man, how did that already start? The buses are about to start coming. Preemptive alarm for buses in a couple of weeks. But, Lisa, can you tell me when you think about that? When do you think you? Do you feel like you stopped dreaming a little bit and started putting your head down, or do you feel like your head is up and you're still big eyed and full of wonder?
Speaker 2:who big eyed in full of wonder. I think I'm that now, but when I do look back, you know, in my 20s and late 20s for those of you that don't know me well I lived abroad with my husband for a few years and that's when I got into coaching and I was actually commuted from Scotland to New York City once a month because that was before online learning. So I'm aging myself a little bit here, but it was a slow burn. It was after I had my first son and, yes, I had my own coaching practice and, yes, I had other responsibilities or fun things to do, but slowly but surely it was like my whole life became about my kids. My whole life became about my family, and that's not to say that that's bad.
Speaker 2:I love being with my family. They're amazing each one of them. But it is to say that I started putting so much time, effort and energy into coaching these young little people to see what they wanted in life and what they wanted to experience and what dreams they have right now and how I can foster and engage that development for them, that I lost sight of asking those same questions in myself, and I think that's common, right. Like I look around and I can't tell you. I've had so many conversations recently with women in a certain season of life and it just seems like they're stuck. It seems like I keep hearing these conversations of I don't even know what now like is this all there is? And I feel that deeply in my bones because I definitely was there.
Speaker 4:What got you out of there?
Speaker 2:Ooh, good question, april, with the zingers today. What got me out of there? Well, a few things. The first was just the awareness of it.
Speaker 2:I have a vivid, vivid memory. I could take you to the exact spot in my house where I looked around and I realized I knew this life. I knew I would be married to an amazing spouse, that I have a great relationship that I definitely do not take for granted. I'm very grateful I have two wonderful kids who make me grow in ways I never thought possible, and I have this cute little house. And my father had passed on.
Speaker 2:And I knew, as odd as it sounds, I knew that life. I knew I'd have all those things. And I remember looking in the mirror, going now what I had no idea, what was past that point in my life, and to sit down and to try to vision board or do all the things people tell you to do was near impossible, cause I had. I didn't even give myself space to dream, to even think what could even be next, because I had essentially gotten everything in my life. I had everything I knew had already actualized. So from there, from that space, there's a few actions I took that we can talk about more.
Speaker 4:Whatever, yeah, I would love to talk about that, but I think that's an important piece in recognizing that. You know, some of us look at our lives and we're like, is this, it Now what? They might be feeling like they're stuck or they can't imagine anymore. I know that's a conversation that my husband and I have often. We're like wow, we never thought we'd be in this position, let alone what more could we even imagine or dream about. But I think, pushing ourselves to challenge, is that an identity piece, is that a story?
Speaker 4:that we've been holding within, maybe nested At least. I know. Tony and I have those conversations often of how much of our belief system and our environment is tied to who we were as little kids and what we grew up believing was available to us. And now isn't it interesting to think about?
Speaker 4:you know, so Tony and I I don't know if you know this, leis we both from a very, I mean from when we were babies until, you know, young kids, we both grew up in trailer parks and I did not know that. Yeah, we were both, you know, in mobile homes and so realizing that place of life and then watching our families and our parents grow like you said, they made it look so easy and now looking at where we are in our life and where we think we're headed, and then what is that storytelling? Our children? We can get man. We can noodle on that for hours, but I think one of the pieces that's really interesting is at what point do you stop dreaming and do you start?
Speaker 4:believing this is all that's available. And are we stuck or we're so distracted thinking through how we're going to parent our children that we don't take the time to actually dream ourselves?
Speaker 2:So yeah, for sure.
Speaker 4:For you when you said you know. You got to that point where you looked around and you're like I know this life. I've always known that this is it. How did you go from that to the getting the clarity of like what's next?
Speaker 2:Yeah Well, first of all, thank you for sharing everything. You and Tony are just man. You guys are such a great couple, just such good role models for everybody, truly, and an inspiration to me, because having these conversations and being intentional about creating the life you want is no joke, right? But having those conversations with people that don't hold judgment, right, and that just want what's best for you, I think is the flip side to the coin. I don't know if you remember this, apes, but in it was end of 2018, I believe we went on that retreat Was it 2018 or 2019 when we rented the B&B and I was like, whatever entrepreneur wants to pop in, pop in and work, I'm just gonna rent this place for the weekend and whatever. And you came and I remember vividly our conversation. It was so pivotal for me because I was working on my values.
Speaker 2:It was after this conversation where I realized my life and I thought I have a deep, deep value of health and yet I was eating junk and I felt like junk and I slept like junk, and it's not all big surprise, but so I dove deep into values again and it was so. I'll never forget this moment with you, because we're sitting in the room and you were pumping right, because any good mom entrepreneur like we've been there. We've been pumping or breastfeeding and having these conversations with pivotal women in our life, and I was sharing with you my values. And one of the values I declared and I owned for myself was simplicity. I wanted a simple life and you went with all the other ones I forget what they were health, wealth, whatever it was. You're like yep, yep, yep. Really, are you sure? Because that was the year after my dad had died and that was the year I also had declared to you that I would say yes to everything in my life. And you were like that is not a good plan. And I remember saying, oh, I know it's not, but I know it's gonna flip something for me and it Burned me out so bad that I was radically desiring simplicity. And because of that conversation with you that really started it for me.
Speaker 2:Because of that conversation with you, I paid more attention to particular transformational and spiritual podcasts I was listening to. I joined a particular coaching program and I just really put my head down and tried to allow myself the space to figure out what I even wanted in this season of life as the person I was now, because the person I am today, it's a version of who I've always been. You know, some, some people and some coaches come out and say, like reinvent yourself or do this. I don't, I don't believe in that. I think who you are is inside of you. It's always been there.
Speaker 2:But society, environment, people in our lives just consciously or subconsciously, really dampen that and we learn, especially as women. We learn how to be a chameleon. We learn how to not use their voice. We learn how to just be quiet and passive and sit there and whatever. Not all the time. I got in trouble. A lot that can be another podcast in school got kicked out of class for speaking up way, and so that that really kickstarted the journey for me. But truly I allowed myself the space to figure it out and To not put a timeline on it. When you're in business, when you're a mom, everything's got a deadline Right. Everything is like faster, bigger, better. I didn't want any of that. I just wanted to allow myself the space to figure it out and allow myself to dream again.
Speaker 2:When I did that, then I sat down. I like to write. I've had a story in my head that I'm not a creative writer and I'm actually a really horrible storyteller that that is something that I've been working through, and so just Going to the table to sit down and write was interesting and I really challenged myself to say, okay, who is Lisa 2.0? Who is this like next level version of the woman that I just really want to become and really want to be, and in hindsight it was very excruciating in the moment to sit down and write and yet I read it now and it's so. It's just who I've always been, which is really entertaining, and I put things in there that I really at the time never thought would ever be possible.
Speaker 2:Things specifically family centric, like living up north for a month. I remember vividly hearing a family doing that, thinking what people do, that I didn't even know people did that. How was that even thing? And now that's our reality and our kids look forward to it because we have a place up north and and I also put in their traveling Europe with the kids every summer and we just took our first trip and it was amazing. Oh, it was so cool, and it was just when you sit back and allow yourself to dream again and what you were saying before about you and Tony, like, what are people even other, what are other people even doing? Right, because you just get so insular in your own world view that you kind of forget what's even possible.
Speaker 2:And it's also okay to experiment, to say do I like this, do I not? So the first year we went up north, for example, we went up for two weeks like, oh, can I even handle it? The answer was yes, and I wanted more because there's no internet and I love that. And so I think allowing yourself to experiment with your dreams is also kind of fun and it just kind of games. It a little bit makes it fun, it's less serious. As adults we just we're so serious and I just want more play and fun and simplicity. So but after I wrote that apes, the biggest thing for me was I didn't believe it. It was really hard for me. I sat there and I was like, seriously, what am I allowed to talk about on this podcast? Anything?
Speaker 4:You can talk about anything.
Speaker 2:Okay.
Speaker 2:But I was like, who has this like crazy, awesome, hot sex life with their husband? That's blob up, you know. Well, the answer is well, that's me now, and a girl you know, and, and who travels Europe with their kids. Actually, I live, we live a simple life. We live a very lean, simple life, but that doesn't make it less abundant, and so learning to understand that an abundant life for me is really about time, freedom and financial freedom to be able to do these things was equally part of the journey.
Speaker 2:But I took what I wrote and I just didn't believe it. But I would read it to myself a couple of times a week and then it became maybe once a day, and then I started to kind of imagine it. Remember when you were a kid, you just lay on the ground outside and look up at the clouds and you just dream about anything Like oh, that cloud looks like a dinosaur, or I'm going to go on a trip with my cousin and that'll be amazing. And I just kind of laid there and I thought, well, what, I don't even know what that would look like, a trip to Europe, where would we go? What would we do? And I just started exploring it, and the more I explored it, the more I felt it, the more I got excited about it and everything just transformed from there Pretty incredible.
Speaker 4:So, if I'm hearing you correctly, you found yourself at that stuck season where you had kind of stopped dreaming, stopped imagining what an incredible life could be, and then you got yourself unstuck by taking a few different, aligned actions, and those actions maybe didn't come easily at first. Is that accurate to say?
Speaker 2:Yeah, so that's a beautiful summary, okay.
Speaker 4:Wow, I'm guessing that there's a lot of people who are listening to this podcast who can probably relate. So if you're listening to this podcast and you're like man, is that available to me? Is that available? Is that type of life available for me? Like, yeah, that sounds amazing to live up north with no internet for a month, or to travel with your children and show them parts of the world that they would only watch on YouTube Otherwise. I was going to say read in a book, and now they're watching me on YouTube.
Speaker 2:They sure are. There's probably some VR set that puts them there.
Speaker 4:Yeah, totally. But I think, recognizing that allowing yourself to dream a little allows you to start creating and crafting what the life that you would like to have becomes.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you know, and it's a dance for me because I do really value simplicity. So doing these things and figuring out how to do them and keep my simplicity value intact is a fun challenge for me, because I like a good challenge too. So it was a good way for me to use my brain. But yeah, that stuck point is real and I never really identified what the word stuck so much as stagnant and just kind of feeling very blah. I just nothing excited me. I just was going through the motions and I think there's a lot of value in that being able to maintain, being able to survive and then on the other side of it, at some point that stagnation becomes the big elephant in the room, right Like that becomes. The problem is I didn't want my life anymore. Truly, I did not want my life anymore. I'm not saying that I was suicidal, but I am saying that I hated my life and after that happened I was like I need to figure this out.
Speaker 4:And I think a lot of people can relate to that.
Speaker 4:They had different seasons of life. But recognizing like, yeah, that I've been there, I you know, that's not speaking to me. You know, I think a couple of years ago I did a podcast talking about stagnation and this image of a pond. And if you imagine a pond that's just sitting there with no current going through it, the muck that just starts creeping in and overtaking that, it just becomes unbearable and kind of gross after a while because there's no energetic flow. But if you look at a pond that has that current running through it, oftentimes it's got that fresh water, it's got a change of scenery on a regular basis, it's got a lot more life that's coming to it and passing through it. And I think you can apply that to our life as well. If you're just having that stagnation or that feeling of stuckness and you're not taking any kind of action or even allowing yourself to imagine what that action could be, eventually that muck is just going to overtake it and it's not going to have that life energy running through it.
Speaker 2:So that's a powerful visual and that's such a great one, and I hope the listeners really pay attention to that visual. Because, while I'm talking a little bit about more planning in your head and working perhaps more with your mind, one thing that I also did on the journey was I just decided for 90 days that I was just going to walk. I had no purpose. I had literally I'm walking to Lake Michigan and back because our house is fairly close, and it was just to see if I could do it. It was just to see if I could be committed. It was just to be in motion, because we can get stuck in our heads too much, right, and then I had birds attacking me and all sorts of funny stories that we can talk about another day as well.
Speaker 4:But yeah, I really appreciate you sharing this because I think a lot of people, myself included, can relate to this for anyone who's listening and they're like, yeah, you know, that's where I'm at right now. I can totally relate. What would you recommend are let's just go with three, what are like three things that somebody could do to get that movement and that energy kind of flowing. Again, like, what would you recommend?
Speaker 2:Great question. So the first thing I would say is allow yourself the opportunity to just figure it out and, without a timeline, allow yourself to dream again. Lay down on the grass. If you need to go for a walk, you know it's okay to get out of your environment. It's equally okay to just set a five minute timer on your work day. The key, though, is just to allow and take your pressure off of yourself. This isn't about judging what you want or don't want. No, just pretend you were your 44 year old kid self, and what would that version of you want? That's kind of exciting. Also, share with us, because I really like to know what people's dreams are.
Speaker 2:Okay, the second I would say is sit down and challenge yourself to either verbally talk it out and record yourself, or I fundamentally believe in the science of writing out your 2.0 version of yourself. So who is this next level version that you want to be? I mean that he or she is inside of you. They're there, right, and so just let that person out. And who does this person hang out with? What do they do? What do they like to talk about? Where do they go?
Speaker 2:And then, finally, I would say, play that script in your head as often as possible. So if you want to read it to yourself, if you want to visualize it like, look at it and visualize certain elements of it every single day, eventually you'll work into multiple times a day and I think eventually it becomes your state of mind. It just becomes who you are. And the coolest part about the third one is you don't even need to believe it at first, but just do yourself the favor of allowing yourself the opportunity by reading this amazing 2.0 version of who you are.
Speaker 2:Becoming. So thanks, you know it sounds so simple and on some level it sounds a little, I don't know, woo-woo, but I'm telling you, as adults we tend to put and especially women, we tend to put everyone first right. As moms, everyone else comes first and we kind of close off that part of our brain that dreams. We close off that part of our brain that just allows. And so I guess part of the aligned actions here is a challenge to you to just dream what do you want? And maybe you already know it, which is even cooler because now it'll happen faster if you write it out.
Speaker 4:Pretty cool and you have the opportunity, if you're feeling called, to share it and have maybe a little accountability for people to rally alongside you. You're welcome to share that on our social media page Paradigm U right, absolutely. That would be super fun to hear what other people are imagining because then you get ideas.
Speaker 4:Then you get, you know, you feel that momentum and that energy of like, ooh, that's cool, I hadn't even thought of that one. Yeah, that's how vast it is, absolutely Very cool. You know, I tend to do something similar and I just ask myself what would be awesome.
Speaker 1:What would be?
Speaker 4:so cool that would impress me. It doesn't have to impress anybody else but it has to impress me, and oftentimes the things that I think would be awesome and impress me rarely would impress or do anything for anyone else. So it's a fun game to ask yourself what actually does it for you, Because then you're not looking outward and saying, okay, how can I keep up with you know X, Y or Z person, but it's what actually would light me up, Isn't it so fun?
Speaker 2:That's brilliant, and so if you're listening and you're getting stuck on the allowing or writing it out, go back to that question. That's brilliant, absolutely.
Speaker 4:Yeah, because everybody has something. That's a completely different thing.
Speaker 4:We're all running a different race right, we're all coloring with different crayons and we're built with a different game plan ahead of us, so it's fun to imagine what would be awesome for you. So, gosh, lise, that's so awesome to hear your story and thank you for sharing. I feel like the advice that you've given and the action steps. They do seem really simple, but equally allowing yourself to actually even carve out time to think about those things, to feel those things, to imagine. Gosh, it just seems like it could be a gift for yourself. Yeah, for sure.
Speaker 2:Well, and thank you for letting me co-host today and talk with everybody. This is so fun, absolutely.
Speaker 4:It's such an honor and for all of you who are on our nukes letter. You may know this, but if you haven't been getting our newsletter, I will keep some of this. Hold it back so that you can join our newsletter, because Lisa and I have been sending out some really cool information the past few weeks to those of you who've joined our newsletter. If you would like to join our newsletter so you can get some of this information ahead of time, you know what? We'll go ahead and put the link in the show notes and I think over the next couple of weeks we're actually gonna be talking about a few additional things, don't you think? Oh, yeah, for sure, I wanna hear more about all of the cool things that you've been up to. Lise.
Speaker 2:And right back at you. You are up to some amazing things as well.
Speaker 4:Hey well, thank you so much and thank you to all of the listeners. We will see you over on the next episode of the Paradigm U podcast. Until then, it is closing time. Cheers to good karma.
Speaker 4:Hey guys, it's April here. If you are someone who likes to know exactly what is happening and you wanna hear it from me first, I'd like to invite you to hop onto our newsletter. We send a weekly newsletter from Paradigm U and, as you can tell, we're going through some major shifts and changes, which is really exciting, and our journey truly has been accelerated. And if you want to follow along that journey and you want more information than just this podcast, I invite you to join us for our weekly newsletter. We don't share your information with anyone. That side note, is a bad move and bad karma, in my opinion. And we don't spam you and blast you with a bunch of crap. I just don't, I don't love that and I wouldn't want to do anything to anyone that I wouldn't want to be reciprocated to be.
Speaker 4:So we put good energy out through our emails and through our weekly newsletter.
Speaker 4:This means that we are guiding you with information, we're offering additional resources beyond what this podcast has, or we're giving you first information, like insider information, before we tell anyone else.
Speaker 4:And, let's be honest, there are thousands and hundreds of thousands of people who listened to this podcast and if you want to get the information before all of these people who are listening to this podcast, you're going to want to be on our newsletter. We send them out once a week, like I said, and that is it. We send the information, we put good energy into your inbox and then the rest is up to you. So the link is in the show notes. I invite you to sign up because we have a lot of big changes happening and I want to make sure that you get that information so that you can stay on track and inspired and you can keep moving towards who it is that you are meant to be and tapping into all of the gifts that you have and are unique to you. All right, on that note, cheers to good karma, good energy and awesome things in your inbox.
Speaker 1:Thank you for listening to this entire podcast. I hope this episode has left you feeling curious and inspired. This podcast is intended to create expansion in your life through unique stories and shared experiences, and if you enjoyed today's episode, I have a request. I'd like to ask you to share this podcast with your friends and family. I bet they'd enjoy it just as much as you have. And, if you found value, please share this on your social media outlets. That is good karma in action, my friends. All right, it is now closing time. Cheers to good karma and the power to choose joy. If you like this, tell your friends. Thanks for listening.